Level Up! Character Growth?

I had a talk with my sister for the first time in over a year a few days ago. The house was empty except for me. She was passing by the house after going home from her conference and decided to stop by. She doesn’t know about the situations at home since my mom doesn’t want her to worry. Anyways, after confirming that I’m the only family member there, she went to go do her own stuff upstairs, leaving me alone to finishing eating lunch downstairs.

My mom called to raise her concerns of her own marital problems and to get my advice. At the same time, my sister comes down, hears what we’re talking about, and decides to chime in. This is technically a family discussion so I don’t completely mind. There were moments when she picked up my phone to speak with our mom and treated the phone like it was hers. That made me a bit uneasy, but I didn’t want to be some annoying bitch and I just let it slide. When the call ended, she returned my phone and began asking me about school.

In the 15 months we’ve been feuding, this was the first time she was directly talking to me and not engaging in another fight. One of the last times we saw each other, we ended up in a pretty bad cat fight. Anyways, due to some other trust issues, I’ve been getting into a habit of voice recording interactions I have with people I’m wary of. Out of the 3 hours we talked, things stayed neutral. I guess finally being alone in the house gave us an opportunity to talk things out. I wasn’t able to get everything off my chest, but I’m pretty sure she didn’t either.

At some points when I wanted to, I had a feeling that if I kept trying to push my point of view onto her, she’d get more defensive and we’d end up in another fight. It turns out, we’re just too different of people. Both of our reasonings seem ridiculous to each other.

I’m not going to try to force a sibling relationship with her. If it resurrects naturally, then sure, but otherwise I might just leave things be. Within the year that she wasn’t in my life, I lived just fine. Some issues may have been harder for me, but it’s not like I completely broke. Also, she said herself that “Lia’s not my sister anymore,” and “Fuck that bitch. She’s not invited to my funeral. Y’all [her twitter followers] have my permission to beat her ass if you see her there.”

Our relationship seems too far gone. We’re neutral for now. I still want to avoid her, but if I actively do, I’m creating more issues within the household, and we already have too much to take care of. I think I need to be more stable to listen to that voice recording. I feel like trying right now would overwhelm me.

TLDR: I talked to my sister for the first time in a while. I don’t think it resolved anything, but…baby steps?