About Me (+venting family issues lol)

2023 May 7

I'm a selfish, self serving, money hungry, disgusting bitch. I'm lucky to grow up in a first world country, have food on my plate, and a good education. All of that has led me to be so spoiled and have my own head stuck so far up my ass that I think I'm the center of the universe (of course I know I'm not, but at least in my life, I matter the most. In your life, you can do whatever you want and rank your own values differently, not that I really care). I don't care about anyone or anything else unless it directly affects me. I couldn't care less about the wars between America and Iraq or whatever until it affects me like if gas prices shoot up or something. I don't care about underage children sewing clothes in non-regulated factories because it's not part of my immediate "world". Of course its a bad situation, but those problems don't stay in my mind 24/7. That doesn't mean I wish those situations become worse, I just simply don't care. All I can do is wish for justice to be served but I won't do anything to directly change it because it doesn't affect me or my life.

I use friends as a purpose to waste my time. Staying home alone is boring so I go out to meet up with some people so my day can go by faster. If I get tired of certain friends because I've been around them too much, then I'll find other friends to hang out in the meantime and I just cycle around those handful of friends to make my years last. I can get bored very easily. All of the jobs I've had only last about 3-4 months. As much as I love my friends, if I hang out with them too much, I can guess what their reactions are going to be or what topics will be brought up and said, and I just get so bored of it so I have to find someone new to talk to. Some friends I have because I actually like them, others annoy the fuck out of me but I keep them around because they give really good gifts or always offer to pay.

I don't want to get married or have a kid. I love myself too much to give a shit about anyone else. If I get married, I'm also tying myself to my husband's family. I'll become their living bitch and servant. If I have a kid, I'll give 20 years of my life raising some little piece of shit that might bite me in the ass by saying, "I hate you mom. I wish I was never born," and just like that I'd wasted my life. I'm here for a fun time, not a long time (although it's not like I have men throwing themselves at me left and right, but that's besides the point).

I have a bitch sister, too. She's what everyone in my extended family calls "the pretty one" as compared to me. It's true though I won't lie. She has like 30,000 followers on Twitter and has men sending her money just because she's pretty and posts like half-naked photos on there. She's skinny and know how to put on makeup (more than I do) and is very conventionally pretty. The only reason why I think she's a bitch is because she expects everyone to give her what she wants. She'll take anything she wants without asking and when you tell her to pay you back or tell her that what she did was wrong, she'll throw a temper tantrum. If you refuse to give her want she wants, she'll "expose" you on Twitter and lets her followers rip you to shreds in the comments section (yes I have made multiple appearances on her Twitter). She begged my parents to go to a private university for a specific major, making my parents pay over 100k out of pocket as well as her already taking out some loans. She then decides that major is too hard and switches over to an easier one that can be found at any college, gets her degree, doesn't get a job, and is now still asking my mom for an allowance of $500 per week so she can spend it on clubbing and drugs. She says she doesn't want a job because her boyfriend will make enough for the both of them (once he gets a job) and can financially support the both of them. She never tells any of the family members 'happy birthday' or 'happy fathers/mothers day' but will dedicate a whole Twitter post to her friend's/follower's birthday. My mom is spineless so she'll give anything to her first born.

That being said, lets go back to me :). Because my parents used all their money on my sister's education, although I was accepted into a university, my parents said they couldn't help and that'd mean I'd have to pay for all of it myself. Me being, fresh out of high school and broke, realized they meant "yea there's no money for you so that means you should go to community college instead." So I gave up my dream school and went to community college for two years. It worked out better in the long run because I got accepted into a program where my community college tuition would be completely free. Whereas my parents where able to fund my sister's college tuition and money for textbooks, I was left to fend for myself. I got by okay until it was time to transfer to an actual university. This time my dream school rejected me. That's fine I was able to get into another one. Luckily I've taken on a few jobs by then and had enough to pay for tuition (+ any grants I got from the state). I'm only getting a college degree so my parents will hop off my dick. I don't really care for the major I chose and I'm probably not going to ever end up using it. If it was up to me, I would've stopped my education at the end of high school, but then that meant I would've been shunned away from my family. Everyone says "it's your life you can do whatever you want" but that easier said than done.

The rest of my life I don't care if I end up just working as a cashier at a grocery store or as some waitress. I'll be living paycheck-to-paycheck but I don't really care. This life is so boring anyways. Most of the people's goals is to find a high paying job so they can support themselves and their family but I don't want a family anyways. My dream is to live alone so I don't need to find such a high paying job.

Yea I know the "dark web" is used for shit like selling drugs, guns, killing people, and having CP, but at least if I post my shit on here, it's a peace of mind cause I know no one in my life would actually ever find it.

TLDR: I'm a bitch with no life and I hate my sister. </3